Worries and Things

Money, bills, baby things, credit cards, house repairs, groceries, gas, etc.   The list goes on and on.  Since getting out of the Army my husband has been searching and searching and searching for a job with little to no luck.  He put off going on unemployment for as long as humanly possible I finally had to sit down and tell him it's not charity.  Yes there are a lot of people sucking the life out of our governments resources and cheating the system *really it's disgusting how many people I know who are on food stamps and just use it for BBQs at the lake and house parties*  you are not one of them.  You were in the military for how long?  You were deployed for how long?  They left your medical condition go unchecked until they had to emergency mediflight you out of a war zone?  They've screwed us out of how much time and really how much money?  If anyone deserves to be on unemployment it's someone like you.  And so finally he gave in.  And we've been making it work pretty well for us.  Unemployment benefits have been a huge blessing to us.  Pair that with him signing up for the reserves and getting out our insurance right in time for someone to get pregnant with baby  #1!  We are so blessed, really we can feel and see God's love for us every day.  But we're human being we can't help but let some worry creep in.  Like now that his unemployment is about to run out and there are still no jobs in sight.  He's looking in to filing an extension, but the site is less than helpful and I've found that googling unemployment issues is like being one of those people that googles medical conditions.  You can't be sure anything is true or correct and it's makes you feel paranoid and sicker than before.  On the site it says this

 Who is eligible for federal extension benefits? Federal extension benefits are designed to provide further income support to eligible unemployed workers who have been out of work for a long period of time. The current legislation makes December 23, 2012, the deadline for filing a first federal extension of benefits, once a regular UI claim runs out. The deadline for filing a second, third, or fourth federal extension of benefits, is also December 23, 2012, once the prior level of extension runs out.

...Ok...what is a 'long' period of time?  I have no clue he's been out of work for almost a year.  And now we've got  a baby on the way so we kind of feel like the pressure is ya know...on.  So apparently what happens is if you are in fact eligible for an extension then they will automatically enroll us and do everything we just wait for some stuff in the mail...but if we go more than two weeks from our last check without hearing anything then we have to get in contact with them.  It's hard because we aren't sure of anything.  And that's such a human thing...we Need reassurance we Need to know what is going to happen we Need control but what we really Need is God is this an opportunity from the Lord?  For us to really lean on him in our time of need to show him that we don't let worry fill our every waking moment when we have him?  Maybe.  I don't really know how to be sure of that but I'm definitely going to try and use this as an opportunity to lean completely on him and not on my own understanding.  I'm a firm believer that God has a plan for everyone that he already knows exactly what is going to happen, I believe he has a job or opportunity out there that is perfect for my husband and for our growing family.  But I have to remember it won't come in our time it will come in His time and really that's going to be the perfect time.  So until then we just need to hold on and pray, have faith, and remember that he has a plan for us we're never forgotten or left behind.

I decided to do a little google search on Bible verses about not worrying and found this amazing site!  It has so many beautiful, wonderful, and just plain comforting verses to many for me to put in this blog post but I'm going to include a couple favorites I can't help myself!  And if you're in need of some inspiration I highly recommend clicking the above link and getting some!

Also, if you noticed I sprinkled in some of our blessings to kind of balance out this post lol!

 

 Matthew 6:34  “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

Luke 12:25 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his  span of life?

John 14:27 Peace I leave with you;my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you.Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid.

Proverbs 3:5-6   Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.

Philippians 4:6-7  do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Romans 8:31  What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?

 

Fear

The Greek word  Phobos *which is where we get the word Phobia today* means "fear" or "terror" and was also the name of the Greek god who is a representation of fear in Greek mythology, Phobos was known for accompanying Ares the god of war into battle along with the ancient goddess Enyo, the goddess of war and strife, the goddess of discord Eris, and his twin brother Deimos. the god of dread and terror. 

Fear.  In today's world they tell you to be afraid of EVERYTHING this food causes cancer, this food makes you fat, you'll die if you don't do this everyday, you could die in a car, you'll definitely die on a plane, terrorists are everywhere.  The list of things to fear goes on and on, books are filled with phobias.  Fear stands in the way of so much, of so many.  Recently Cassie a blogger that I've recently started to follow wrote A very interesting post and it got me to really start thinking. 

What am I REALLY afraid of?  Do those fears stand in the way of me living a really authentic, and amazing life?  The life that God wants for me?  What are these fears?  Why do I have them? What can I do to eradicate these fears?

I felt inspired to make a list *like I always do* of the fears that worry me the most, the ones that so often occupy my mind, and my heart.  One of my fears actually intertwined with my blog and this post.  So that is when I decided to do a blogging series on fear.  I know there will always be things that I'm afraid of but there are some that I can definitely do something about.  So I'll be showing my list of fears here and then this upcoming week I'll go into more detail about each one, and how I plan on overcoming them or just coming to terms with them. *I will also be very honest in these posts and hope that people are kind enough to keep negative opinions and judgements to themselves*

Now I'm not a huge Yoda fan *he kind of creeps me out* but he made an excellent point.

"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger.  Anger leads to hate.  Hate leads to suffering"

 I don't think you could ever get anything more true than this from a weird little Jedi, fighter, troll dude.  The stuff about the dark side notwithstanding, Yoda makes an awesome point.  Fear Does lead to anger, anger Does lead to hate, and any negative emotions like hate will Always lead to suffering.  If i look back at the times I've lashed out at people at the very root of it, it was almost always because I was scared of something.   
Bet you never knew star wars got so deep did ya?


So here is the list of the fears, worries, and anxieties that keep me up at night. The ones that make my mind go crazy.  And the ones that stop me from living the life that God wants me to.

1. Driving
2. Being honest about my body
3. The end of the world
4. My brothers & Parents
5. Something happening to my marriage
6. losing someone else
7. my inability to follow through