Sunday, April 22, 2012

Fear #1

As a follow up to my previous post on "Fear" tonight I'm going to be quickly addressing Fear #1 and that is Driving. Now this fear came about like this, I hurried up and got my license so i could drive myself to work I learned what u could as fast I could {which was just enough to pass the test} so I never really took the time to LEARN. Now I have very bad anxiety but I've always known how to drive a car, truck, tractor, anything {and by always I mean 5} it's not how-to-work the car that freaks me out. It's the rules of the road! As soon as I'm out there everything leaves my mind and I go blank and freak out and just don't know what to do!!! Now this is only in the city or big towns, out in the country I'm fine. Hills, crazy turns and curves? I'm a pro. It's very frustrating and embarrassing to have the problem! I always try and hide it and not let people know what's why I don't want to go hangout or I can't make it somewhere in town. Or I can't go out of town and visit friends! I've lied about this to SO many people to cover up the embarrassment of what I'm sure anyone and everyone would consider a ridiculous fear because the thing is they aren't me. They don't know how scary it is for me. And I don't know that they'd understand. So I've seriously let it hinder my standard of living. It's not enjoyable to have to be this embarrassed about it! So it's the worst in for me in the sense that it actually affects my day-to-day life, But thankfully for me it's also probably the easiest to fix! I'm going to go to the DMV and get a driver's teaching manual, go online if I have to, and go practice driving in town with my mom or husband or someone! I'm definitely going to take some action and get a hold of this fear!!!!!!!!! I don't want to let fear hold me back from living a beautiful, wonderful, spontaneous, care-free life! I won't let it! Hoping to get no negative feedback from this post and that people will be kind and understanding <3



Erin said...

Girl, I am SO proud of you for sharing your heart, being honest, and for facing your fears. I honestly have a similar fear and this post really encouraged me in knowing I'm not alone. I fear getting into a car accident - have nightmares about it - and sometimes don't want to drive because of it. Yet, you are right - we need to trust the Lord and do all in our power to face these fears and work on getting better.

I am seriously so thankful that we "met" through Instagram, I love your heart .. you are a gem and an inspiration to me! :)


Stacie said...

I totally understand your fear! I am a pro at country driving but I HATE driving in cities and where there are lots of people (especially one way streets and all that). I still hate going into the city but what really helped me was all the driving trips my husband and I made back and forth from Maine to North Carolina. I really had no choice and HAD to drive in the city (yeah, I mean NY and DC....yikes!). If you really push yourself and go practice your driving in the city you will be able to quell this fear. Good luck!!! I know you can do it =)

xoxo Stacie

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